Oh crap! Here comes my 'favorite' patron. He calls himself the "Doctor". A doctor of what I'm not exactly sure. Since I've worked here I've never known the man to have an active occupation. He's an authority on everything except how to use a computer so he makes our lives a living hell with his insistence on being catered to whenever he uses the public Internet terminals. His routine is the same... he comes bounding up the stairs with his classical music blaring out of his ear buds and stakes out his favorite computer terminal. He tosses down his bicycle helmet and knapsack, then crosses the room to the free box of newspaper comics and grabs a select page and then proceeds to spread it out over the chair so that his bum doesn't come into contact with any potential library cooties.
He then spends the next two hours of his day complaining about the quality of the printouts and the size of the font used on certain websites and constantly interrupting the Ref Desk staff while they are assisting other patrons or are on a phone call. To top it all off, when he's finally finished and ready to leave he starts packing up his stuff but never fails to pick up the used comics, fold them neatly and return them to the stack in the free box. He has a problem with our cooties but doesn't seem to mind sharing his own with the rest of the library. Go figure.
