Timber!

One of my least favorite activities in the library is waking up the drunken public. We have a policy of no sleeping in the library but it is really hard to enforce when people are passed out drunk and refuse emergency assistance so we have to rouse them up without infringing on their civil liberties and ask them to leave the library sometimes with a security guard escort. They all say the same thing "I wasn't sleeping, I was just resting my eyes". It almost makes me want to pre-record all the loud and obnoxious snores beforehand so I can play back their sawing log noises to them as proof of their condition.